I'm worried about a friend...

Witnessing a friend break down mentally is very difficult. Frequently, you as a concerned friend want to help but are not sure how. After all, one cannot control what another person does. But, one can make a real and important difference in increasing the chances that the person at risk gets the help he or she needs. A mental breakdown can take many forms.  

Here are some things that you might be seeing that suggest you act:

● Depression -  Your friend is feeling so down that he or she is clearly functioning very poorly, if at all.
● Loneliness - Your friend has largely withdrawn from contact with others.
● Ultra-high activity or agitation mixed in with periods of deep depression - Sometimes you can’t quite believe how high energy is your friend.  He or she seems great until the crash.  This up and down is a recurring pattern.
● Repetitive excessive drug or alcohol use.
● Frequent high anxiety - Seeing this much anxiety causes you alarm.
● Acting Strangely - Your friend leaves reality as most people know it.  He or she might be hearing voices that no one else hears or seeing things that are not there.  Sometimes, he or she may offer an elaborate (and ridiculous) theory which you know makes absolutely no sense.
● Talk of suicide or any actions related to harming oneself or others.

If you see any of the above OR other behaviors that have you worried,  it is important to act now.

Here is what you can do:

1. Tell your friend you are worried and want them to get professional help. If your friend will talk, your job is to listen.  But always emphasize that getting professional help is needed.


2. If your friend is talking about suicide or doing anything related to suicide or indicating any harm to others, tell a responsible adult like a resident advisor, a parent or the counseling center. IF it is URGENT, call!

University Police973-655-5222

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-TALK

Call Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) at 973-655-5211

Stay with your friend until help arrives.

3. Complete the Report of Student of Concern 

4. Speak to a counselor at CAPS or at Let's Talk to help you deal with your own stress and discuss the best ways to manage this situation.

Learn more at the websites of: